Stuck at Home, thinking of another home.

 Once there is some damage to a relationship, it starts to deteriorate. You should know, relationship and marriage is a mutual community. But it takes one person to break up and divorce. A lot of women, thought their man love mistress while mistress think man love his wife. Actually men doesn’t love anyone, he only love himself. I am talking about men that fall under cheaters. 

Why? If you really love your wife, you wouldn’t have an affair. If you really love your mistress then you would have divorce. Once there’s a dishonesty in a relationship, it’s a mental tortured to the victim. And I realised most of the people who handle the dispute is kinda wrong. They tend to look more into detail but all these details and prove will cause more harm than good. The evidences will constantly haunt you again and again in the future despite you have move on with a new person. The simplest way to solve this problem is first ask yourself if you can’t accept this dishonesty in relationship then let it go. When you caught him cheating, don’t ask your partner will he/she change instead ask yourself if you will still accept him after all these happened.

I like this song, it reminds me that; 

Sometimes, I can be difficult to hold on to.

Sometimes, I tend to push people away. 

Sometimes, I worry the people who thought I'm precious might find out that I am very ordinary.

Sometimes, I preferred to be alone & do nothing. 

and 'sometimes' can be 'all the time'.

No one really know me.

I just portrayed to be somebody I want you to see. 

AM I SAD?

no hahahha opps

I argued with Nic alot recently. To a point that Nic began to call me 'chilli-padi'. My mom used to called me chilliPadi. I remember one of the argument I was like "I don't even know if I want to continue this relationship anymore. I AM BETTER OFF ALONE"

Nic will reply "you chicken out?" 

"nah, I don't want to waste my energy on someone who has no standard in life. YOU TOXIC" I said.

Yeap, we argue alot. Saying things we don't mean it and still reconcile. 
HeartBeat extra fast whenever I shut Nic away.

 Sometimes I can be insensitive and self-centered person. But no doubt Nic could handle me pretty well so far. I wish I meet him earlier or maybe he appear just at the right time.

Don't give up unless one's commit adultery.

A breakthrough came when a counselor said to her, “The best way for you to be a great mother to your daughter is by being a great wife to your husband."

Each spouse should see the great thing that Jesus is doing in the life of their mate through the Word, the gospel. Each spouse then should give him or herself to be a vehicle for that work and envision the day that you will stand together before God, seeing each other presented in spotless beauty and glory.

“I see who God is making you, and it excites me! I want to be part of that. I want to partner with you and God in the journey you are taking to his throne. And when we get there, I will look at your magnificence and say, ‘I always knew you could be like this. I got glimpses of it on earth, but now look at you!’

 

When two Christians who fully understand this stand before the minister all decked out in their wedding finery, they realize they’re not just playing dress-up. What they’re saying is that someday they are going to be standing not before the minister but before the Lord.

 

And they will turn to see each other without spot and blemish. And they hope to hear God say, “Well done, good and faithful servants. Over the years you have lifted one another up to me. You sacrificed for one another. You held one another up with prayer and with thanksgiving. You confronted each other. You rebuked each other. You hugged and you loved each other and continually pushed each other toward me. And now look at you. You’re radiant.”

 

Romance, sex, laughter, and plain fun are the by-products of this process of sanctification, refinement, and glorification. Those things are important, but they can’t keep the marriage going through years and years of ordinary life.

 When God sees Adam alone, a male without a female, God says it is “not good.”4 It is the first thing in the universe that God finds imperfect

 

 

In John 13:1–17, Jesus, on the night before his death, famously washed his disciples’ feet, both showing and teaching them how he was redefining authority and headship. He said:

Do you understand what I have done for you? . . . You call me “Teacher” and “Lord” and rightly so, for that is what I am. Now that I, your Lord and Teacher, have washed your feet, you also should wash one another’s feet. I have set you an example that you should do as I have done for you. I tell you the truth, no servant is greater than his master.

What keeps the marriage going is your commitment to your spouse’s holiness.

You’re committed to his or her beauty. You’re committed to his greatness and perfection. You’re committed to her honesty and passion for the things of God. That’s your job as a spouse. Any lesser goal than that, any smaller purpose, and you’re just playing at being married.

 

Jesus died not because we were lovely, but to make us lovely.

 

Maybe your family’s way of operating was wise in a particular regard, but you should only carry it into your new family if it makes sense to your spouse, too. You shouldn’t do it simply because “my family did it that way.” When you marry, you commit to becoming a new decision-making unit and to developing new patterns and ways of doing things. If you rigidly impose the patterns that you saw in your own family rather than working together with your spouse to create new ones that fit both of you, you haven’t “left home” yet.

 

Plenty of people have marital problems because they haven’t “left” to cleave to their spouses. You have failed to leave your parents if you are more driven by their wishes and expectations than by your spouse’s.

 

 

Marriage is so much like salvation and our relationship with Christ that Paul says you can’t understand marriage without looking at the gospel. So let’s do that. Salvation is a fresh start. Old things have passed away— behold, the new has come.

In other words, Jesus asks for nothing that any spouse doesn’t ask for. “Put me first,” he says, “have no other pseudo-gods before me.” It is the same with marriage. Marriage won’t work unless you put your marriage and your spouse first, and you don’t turn good things, like parents, children, career, and hobbies, into pseudo-spouses.

 

 

How do you get the power of grace? You can’t create this power; you can only reflect it to others if you have received it. If you see Jesus dying on the cross for others, forgiving the people who killed him, that can be just a crushing example of forgiving love that you will never be able to live up to. But if instead you see Jesus dying on the cross for you, forgiving you, putting away your sin, that changes everything. He saw your heart to the bottom but loved you to the skies. And the joy and freedom that comes from knowing that the Son of God did that for you enables you to do the same for your spouse. It gives you both the emotional humility and wealth to exercise the power of grace.

 

Marriage has unique power to show us the truth of who we really are. Marriage has unique power to redeem our past and heal our self-image through love. And marriage has unique power to show us the grace of what God did for us in Jesus Christ. In Ephesians 5, Paul tells us that Jesus laid down his life for us, forgiving at great cost us to make us something beautiful. And because he has done it for us, we can do the same for others. Our sins hurt Jesus infinitely more than your spouse’s sins hurt you. You may feel your spouse is crucifying you, but our sins really did put Jesus on the cross, yet he forgave us.

 

And someday the whole universe will see what God sees in us.

OH SEEMS LIKE THERE'S A DELAY FOR THE PLANNED MARRIAGE. 

#keepNIC&CIN

 

MY ONE YEAR CONTRACT AS GOVERNMENT WORKER IS OFFICIALLY ENDED.

What's next?