Nothing compares, no worries or cares.

Nothing compares, no worries or cares. Regrets and mistakes, they're memories made. Who would have known how bittersweet this would taste?

 "No woman is gonna leave you because you made a mistake. She left you because you made it a habit."

HEYYY.

It's November! My birthday month!! It is special because I shared the same birthday week with Nic. It is more special this time because it's my first time having Nic be with me on my birthday. Yeap, last year early November, I hadn't known Nic yet. Perhaps, we were still a stranger back then. It's crazy to think that the stranger a year ago is now my husband.
 

'Learning how to love and care for the stranger to whom you find yourself married.'

21Nov2020-we hang out for the first time together.
5May2021-Nic proposed to me.
21Nov2021-we are married!

Each timeline is 6 months interval! I never expect to do such. Always thought before you marry someone, you ought to date for at least a few years. But I guess we wanted to do it right before God, and Nic really knows me! Having a partner who is as chill as I can be damn kancheong, you see. We both were shocked to realize we hadn't done much except complete 6 months of counseling by the pastor. 

Thus, in October itself, we went to JPN to get all the documents ready, renew my IC (because my IC religion status was a Buddhist lol), buy a wedding ring, pre-wedding photoshoot, meet Nic's family, buy R.O.M dress, etc.

21 November 2021
We did our paper signing and solemnization at the church witnessed by less than 15 people, followed by a simple lunch at the Thai cuisine restaurant.

Fast forward to this day; it has been a week since the ROM; it's funny how we both will constantly and suddenly remind each other that we are now married.  Sometimes, when I feel sad for no reason, I will eventually feel so blessed and glad when I look at Nic. He is perhaps the best thing that ever happened to me. A few nights ago, I still remembered that I couldn't sleep at night (probably because I nap too much during the day). I begin to sink into thoughts and doubts. I was even hoping for a time-travel machine. There are a few things I want to experience again in the past, but when I look at the man lying down next to me,  I think that current life is what I ever want. Not the ideal one, but yet it is the closest best life I can imagine. 

After married, we don't argue anymore.. maybe because we are still in the honeymoon year or maybe because most of the time we understand that no point arguing something we can't change, and we probably have discussed every possible topic during courting. 

Having said that, during the engagement period, we do face crazy obstacles. I have Nic's old friend who approached me and told me Nic's bitter history, I have friends who beg me to reconsider, I have my very worried mother and advised me to postpone the ROM, and I have Church deny and are against the solemnization unless Nic repents in the way the church wants this. Of all these crap, Nic's pet dog (Paul) doesn't like me and tries to attack me a few times. Nic was like, "usually after I spank Paul, it will stop, and I have never seen him acting aggressively like this in the past". But eventually, we received a blessing from all our family, friends, and church, except Paul. lol

"You are not going to marry an angel who is perfect; you are going to marry a ordinary man who is like everybody else who has baggage."

Even after all this time, I know I am not perfect/ not even close to a perfect woman. Also, it doesn't make me more superior or has minor sins than Nic. From God's eyes, we are both sinners. Does Nic's sin more significant than anyone else and on whose standard you refer from. If you were to insist on judging Nic, know that I AM WORST! HAHAHA

But do I regret my past? Nah. I do repent and am ashamed, but a part of me still feel that at least I have done it and know it's a mistake. Otherwise, I will spend forever wondering "what if." My past is a part of my testimony ok. After you accept Christ, you are still a sinner alright and you are still missing the point and fall short of God's glory. The fact is, don't be a slave to the sin. As long as you have the heart of repentance, you are on a safe path, I guess. 

Back to reality, I am currently using a new laptop ASUS VIVOBOOK15-m513u. Honestly, I hardly use laptop nowadays compared to my university days. RIGHT. Hope I will read articles more frequent by using this new gadget. Nothing much to update; share with you some of our pre-wedding photoshoots yo.

 

The other day I had an interesting conversation with Nic. Talking about how churches today either 

-Preach the bible well but the member was corrupted/judgemental.

-Doesn't preach the bible accurately but the church people are very kind and helpful.

The conclusion is that every church going through a spiritual battle, the devil will always try to cause division and confusion among the people. So, instead of talking about those churches, we should pray for them and the people! We should not leave the church unless God's Holy Spirit prompts us to leave. Leaving a church could lead to a bad example to the young believer who may secretly look up to us thus most of the time we are advised to stay at the church which God places us.

(Malachi 2:13-16)
"You cry out, 'Why doesn't the Lord accept my worship?' I'll tell you why! Because the Lord witnessed the vows you and your wife made when you were young. But you have been unfaithful to her, though she remained your faithful partner, the wife of your marriage vows. 

"Didn't the Lord make you one with your wife? In body and spirit, you are his. And what does he want? Godly children from your union. So guard your heart; remain loyal to the wife of your youth. 'For I hate divorce!' says the Lord, the God of Israel. 'To divorce, your wife is to overwhelm her with cruelty,' says the Lord of Heaven's Armies. So guard your heart; do not be unfaithful to your wife." 

Jesus taught that marriage doesn't exist in heaven. So one day we all stand before the Lord singly as individuals. I am glad I met Nic. I am glad Nic chose me in this YOLO on earth. I still remember a few months before meeting Nic, I began to pray for a life partner, and, how I always reassure that God is preparing me and my future husband emotionally prior meeting each other. *Having peace and trust in God's plan.*

It’s surreal that I’m now married! 

Sometimes I may worried, stressed, confused.

but I know that God will make the right things happen so it will all be ok.♡

Thank you for reading. KTHNXBYE.